Wednesday, 30 September 2015

Tips For Coping With Two Children Under Two

My youngest two children are only 14 month's apart age wise, I know I'm crazy. Having children so close in age meant that I had two children under two years of age for ten whole months. This meant two lot's of nappies to change daily, two lots of little ones to entertain and look after everyday and many sleepless night's. Having children so close in age can be amazing, but it can also be so incredibly hard. I thought that it would break me on many an occasion, sometimes I went day's without showering or getting dressed, the house was a mess, I cried most day's due to exhaustion and rarely drank a hot drink.

But it is not all bad as your children will have an amazing bond and grow up together, you also deal with all the sleepless nights and nappy changing all in one go. It also gets easier, it really does, you learn to cope and find way's that work for you. My children are now 13 months and 2 years 3 months old and I miss those crazy early days of having two under two. So here is a few tips I learnt on how to cope with two children under two. 



1.) Be Prepared. I found by being a little bit organised and always having things to hand made everything so much easier.I kept a supply of nappies and wipes and spare clothes for both children downstairs where I could easily get them, I also had some upstairs for during the night. I also always had the changing bag packed with nappies, wipes, spare clothes etc so that I was ready to go out.

2.) Have a routine. This is something that has been a massive saviour to us and I don't know how I would have coped without it. When we had Jacob we made sure that he just slotted into Sophia's routine which she has had since birth, this made her feel more secure with having a new baby brother and it also helped settle Jacob into a routine. It is not a rigid routine it is just they had the same nap time each day and meals at around the same time and then the same bedtime routine each night of evening meal, TV, bath, pj's, bottle and bed. 

3.) Order your shopping online. I found going grocery shopping impossible with two little ones as one of them would always cry and getting them both into trolleys and car seats was a nightmare. I now just sit and order it all online once a week and it is so much less stressful and takes half the time a regular shopping trip would. I also ordered most of the children's Christmas presents online last year too as I did not want to face the busy shops with two little ones. 

4.) Don't feel like you have to go out. When I had Sophia I use to go to so many baby groups and we were out every single day. When Jacob arrived everyone said to me "keep going out you need to get out the house when you have two little ones " or " getting out the house will give you a break" I felt like I had to go out so I tried going to playgroups, but I just found it so stressful as the baby was crying for a bottle and the toddler was running wild and it was just too much work. So I stopped going to the baby groups as I found it far less stressful staying at home. I found just going for a walk to the local shops and then waiting for my partner to be off work to go to soft plays much easier. So don't feel like you have to go out when you don't want to.

5.) Don't try and be superwoman. We all have visions before we have children of how we will be the perfect parent, but hands up who actually lives up to those expectations ? I know that I don't. When I just had the one baby it was fine I could go to baby groups, keep the house clean, keep myself looking presentable and the baby looking immaculate. Throw another baby into the mix and trying to keep up with everything is just impossible. So don't even try baby's are tiring, don't try and be superwoman thinking you can do everything no one will mind if the baby is in a sleepsuit, your hairs a mess and you have a giant laundry pile.

6.) Drop your standards. Following on from the previous point I think it is a good idea to drop your standards. I would get so wound up that the bathroom needed cleaning or the washing needed doing and that there was clutter everywhere. After the children went to bed I would be cleaning and not really getting anywhere as I was so tired, in the end I just decided to drop my standards. I now rarely iron and only iron things that need ironed so no more wasted hours ironing pillow cases. I have also realised the clutter is here to stay for the next few years so I may as well get use to it and as long as the laundry is done, dishes washed, bed's made and the house is a bit tidy then that's OK, no one else will mind so why should I.

7.) Ignore Criticism. I have heard so much criticism over the years I think it is part of being a parent everyone has an opinion on your parenting skills. I have lost count of the times I have had people comment on having two children so close in age. I have just learnt to ignore it now as what is the point of worrying about what others think, as long as my children are well looked after, clean and happy then that is all that matters. 

8.) Sometimes it is ok to have a pj day. If the baby has been up all night and you are tired then sometimes it is ok to have a lazy pj day. When I was tired I would often stay in my pjs with the children in their pj's and we would have a lazy day on the sofa watching Disney films and reading books, the toddler loved it, the baby enjoyed a day at home with cuddles and I loved it too I just left the housework and spent the day with my little people and It was bliss. 

9.) Make time for you. I always seem to put myself bottom of the list when it comes to anything as I look after my children, my partner, the house but never have time just for me and I end up getting grumpy and feeling low. Sometimes being a mum is tiring both mentally and physically and you just need that little break from motherhood whether that be a trip to meet friends for coffee or a soak in a nice hot bubble bath. Make sure you make time for you as a happy mummy makes happy children.

10.) Accept help. Us mums always think we should do everything for are children but having two children so close in age can be so hard at times so any offer of help you are offered accept it. We don't really have anyone to help us with the children and have never been on a night out since Sophia was born over two years ago. Sometimes family will offer to take one of them out for an hour or two and it is lovely when they do as it means I get a little bit of a break. If anyone offers you help accept it as it will make things so much easier for you. 

11.) Always make sure you have coffee and chocolate biscuits. I honestly think the only way I got through those first few months of having two under two was having lot's of coffee in the house and a stash of chocolate biscuits. Caffeine and sugar kept me going and gave me a little pick up when I was feeling exhausted, I would not have got through those sleepless nights without them.

12.) Enjoy it. Yes having two under two's is so incredibly hard but enjoy it, it goes by so quickly and I wish that I could I go back and enjoy it all over again. I wish I had of taken more photos and just enjoyed it more as I feel like I have missed out on it as I was always so busy and tired. Cherish watching your children's bond grow and enjoy those newborn cuddles as they will grow up and before you know it these precious days will be gone and be nothing but a distant memory. My eldest is almost 13 and I would give anything to have her a baby again. 

If you have children close in age what did you find helped you stay sane during those early month's? 

                      
                      Follow Me : Twitter / Facebook / Instagram / Pinterest / Bloglovin 



You Baby Me Mummy

21 comments:

  1. This is wonderful! I'm sure so many mothers can relate and will find this useful. I particularly like the "ignore criticism" aspect which can be used for life in general. Well done.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, I really hope someone can find it useful and realise that parenting can be tough. I love the ignore criticism bit too and totally agree it can be applied to anything in life xx

      Delete
  2. Great post - i had 2 under 2 at one point as well so can totally relate to everything you're saying. I think these tips will go along way to helping other mums in a similar situation.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Vikki, It is so hard having 2 under 2 at time's. I hope they can help someone in a similar situation as I felt so alone a few months ago when I had 2 under 2 xx

      Delete
  3. I feel number 11 is what your friends and family should make an effort of doing too - keeping you stocked up with treats and caffeine! Great post, and it was very insightful for a non-parent like me. I don't know how you do it! x

    | www.ibelieveinromeo.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Zoe , I think that you just have to get on with it and cope once you have children as you have no other option. xx

      Delete
  4. Two under two must be tough. I have one two year old and that's enough haha. I agree preparation is key!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It really was tough, I can honestly say that I would never do it again as it was such hard work. xx

      Delete
  5. My 2 are 24 months and 4 days apart and agree completely with the caffeine and sugar! The only way I get a hot drink is by using my travel mug. My youngest is 8 months now so feel like we're starting to ease (once Baby L starts sleeping that is).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh I never even thought of using a travel mug even though my partner has a one, what a great idea. My son is one and now things are starting to ease too but he is still not sleeping which I think was the main thing I have struggled with, lack of sleep xx

      Delete
  6. I'm not a mommy, but I believe that a routine is key when having kids because you need to learn how to organize your life with the babies. It's unbelievable the amount of times I hear mommies saying that they have been criticized because of their choices. It makes me really mad!
    I'm so glad you found a good in between with your family! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for a lovely comment, I was so un- organised and hated routine before I had my children now I love it and it is the only thing that keeps me sane xx

      Delete
  7. I had those crazy days as my 2 oldest are 19 months apart, it was a haze of soft play, music group, nappies and cbeebies but now it's lovely to see them close. I wish I remembered more of the youngest one's baby days though! #thelist

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am the same I really wish I could remember more of my sons baby days as they just seem to have passed by in a flash and I was to tired and busy to enjoy them xx

      Delete
  8. There is 2 1/2 years between my 2. I just couldn't imagine having 2 under 2 or that only have an age difference of 14 months. Well done for managing. It is very difficult sometimes though running after a 3 year old when you have to wheel the 8 months old around.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Janine, I know I am crazy only having a 14 month age gap but now they are a bit older it is nice and getting easier. I totally agree running after a toddler when you have a baby in a buggy is hard work I put my daughter on the buggy board with reins on so she cant run away xx

      Delete
  9. I wanted to have two little ones close in age, and getting pregnant so quickly with Little F I thought I could. Getting pregnant the second time round took as quite a few months though and the result is that Little F will be 2.5 by the time baby is born. I hope they still can have a close bond, play together and grow up together.
    Well done for surviving two young kids at once! I'm trying to image what it will be like with a toddler and a newborn and I just don't know how things will work for us...
    #thelist

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Honestly try not to worry as it wont be as bad as you fear, you just sort of manage and it all works out ok. I am sure they will have an amazing bond and I think the gap you will have will be lovely. We were the other way around and wanted a slightly bigger gap but I fell pregnant the first time we even tried which was a shock xx

      Delete
  10. Some great tips here. shopping online can be a huge help and also dropping your standards I and to learn with just one so I definitely think it's important to just accept that you won't have an immaculate house with two children. Pj days are awesome and should not be frowned upon :) Thanks for sharing your tips, I'm sure lot's of mums out there will find them super useful.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, I don;t know where I would be without Pj days and online shopping xx

      Delete
  11. I had my second child when my first was 15 months and my third 2 months short of my first's 4th birthday. 2 under 2 for 9 months then 3 under 4 for 2 months. The early years were hard i am facing different challenges now (9,12&13)

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for commenting I read and reply to every single one.