I started this year off full of good intentions of finally losing weight once and for all. I had been following the Slimming World diet last year and had managed to lose almost two stone (1 stone 13lbs ) and then Christmas got in the way and of course I ate way to many chocolates and treats and inevitability gained weight. I decided that as it was a new year I would start a fresh with Slimming world and rejoined with a clean slate, with the promise of blogging my weight loss journey every week.
I got off to a good start with an impressive 5.5lb weight loss in my first week which I was overjoyed at. However the next week I gained 1lb thanks to 'star week' aka that time of the month when I gorge on carbs and chocolate, I was expecting it though and was not at all bothered. I left my group feeling full of determination that I would stick to plan 100 % and have a fantastic weight loss the following week.
I did stick to plan and I can hand on heart say that it was the first week in all my time of doing slimming world that I stuck to everything 100 %, I wrote everything I ate down, I was within my syns everyday and I ate so much fruit and veg. I stepped on the scales full of confidence expecting a good loss as even my clothes felt bigger, I had gained half a pound!
I was gutted and did not even stay to group (I know that was wrong of me) as I did not want to hear how others had lost lots of weight but had ate a takeaway and been out drinking, when I had been so good and somehow gained weight! Childish I know, I hold my hands up and admit I went straight home and ordered a Chinese take-away for tea. Before getting back on plan for the rest of the week in the hope of having a loss the following week.
I did lose weight the following week with a 2.5lb loss but unfortunately I could not stay to group as the other half was going out and I did not want to take three children to group with me as it would have been chaos. Losing weight again made me feel like I was back on track and determined to stick to plan. As we all know being a mum often means things crop up and I ended up having to miss the following week due to Jacob being unwell.
Last week I returned to group to find I had lost another 2.5lbs which I was thrilled about as when Jacob was unwell I hold my hands up and admit I was not as 'good' as I should have been. I could not stay to group though as the other half was working so I had no one to watch the little ones. This week he is working late again, so I won't be able to stay but starting next week he will be getting Mondays off again so I can start staying to group each week.
I now feel like I can focus on losing weight again and I am more determined than ever to get this weight off. I recently admitted that I had been suffering from PND after the birth of my son 17 months ago and as part of my depression I comfort ate, which in turn made me feel worse as I was gaining weight and feeling uncomfortable and lost my confidence. Now I am starting to feel less depressed I am ready to break the comfort eating cycle as the food does not even bring me any comfort it just makes me feel more down about myself and it needs to stop. If I want to get better and be more like me and the mum I want to be then I need to lose weight to get my confidence back and the only one who can lose the weight and make the changes is me.
So that is where I am at with my weight loss journey at the moment, hopefully now I have faced up to things and admitted why I comfort eat I can finally break the cycle I am in. I also know that to lose weight I have to attend my group every single week and most importantly stay to image therapy every week as the weeks I stay I do lose more weight then weeks I don't. I want to use this blog to record my weight loss and let other people know that it is ok if you are finding losing weight hard like I am, as long as we keep going we will lose weight I know that for a fact.